John Hodgman
Songs in corporation with
Newton Wolves Rap (GZA/Genius & John Hodgman)
Punjaub March (Red Baraat feat. John Hodgman)
2012-10-02: Best Show Gems, 'Philly Boy Roy Talks About the World Cup' (Tom Scharpling with Philly Boy Roy, John Hodgman & John Oliver)
Songs
'SWUSPOs'
A Brief Timeline of the Lobster in America
A Clarification Regarding the Dramatic Situation in Which Humans Fight Animals
A Curious Institution
A Curiouser Institution / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "President Mondale"
A Fascinating Quote That Is Almost Entirely Accurate
A Note on Organization / A Note on Sports
A Special Bonus Excerpt From My Next Book
About Jonathan Coulton, Contributing Troubadour
Advice, How-To, and Miscellaneous: How to Deal with Some Common Infestations, Part 1
Alabama
Alaska
All of Your Questions Answered, or at Least Five More: More Answers, Part 1
Alternate Method for Predicting the Future
An Impostor's Introduction
An Introduction, Part 1
An Introduction, Part 2
An Introduction, Part 3
An Introduction, Part 4
An Outroduction: the Secret of Your Identity and How You Got That Terrible Scar
An Urban Legend Regarding the Declaration of Independence
Answers to Your Questions About the Mole-Men, Part 1
Answers to Your Questions About the Mole-Men, Part 2
Arizona
Arkansas
Attack Ad #1
Attack Ad #2
Attack Ad #3
Bar Bets You Are Sure to Win / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "A Completely Benign Story That Does Not Merit a Lawsuit"
Basics of Snow and Ice Warfare
Beard Manual
Bogman Zeke
Brief Lives of Some Notable Hoboes: Queen Myra Nelson, the Lady Strange
Brooklyn Inventions
California
Colonial Jobs Involving Eels
Colorado
Common Short and Long Cons
Connecticut
Consider the Fork...
Construct a Poker Personality
Credits
Dan Payton and the Sasquatch
Debated Planets
Delaware
Diversions for the Asthmatic Child Who Cannot Play in the Snow
End Titles
Even More More Information Than You Require, with a Special Emphasis on Food and Animals (A Kind of Food): Six Foods of the New World, Part 1
Famous Novels That Were Not Originally Published as Books
Fast Facts About Philadelphia
Fast Facts About Teddy Roosevelt That Have Been Circulated on the Internet / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "President Booth"
Feral Americans, Part 1
Feral Americans, Part 2 / the Crossword Code
Films in Which I, John Hodgman, Have Made Cameo Appearances
First, Let's Talk "Craps."
Flight vs. Invisibility
Florida
Four Dubious Fables of Chicago
Four Famous Monsters and Their Hunters / Former People's Liberation Army Corporal Hu Zhao-Han and the Tianchi Lake Monster
Four Forgotten Cocktails, Part 1
Four Forgotten Cocktails, Part 2
Further Information You Can Use Today: Five Secrets of Successful Negotiation
Gambling: the Sport of the Asthmatic Man: How to Gamble and Win
Georgia
Good Evening
Good Morning
Government Programs You Can Take Advantage of TODAY
Handy Measurements of Time When You Do Not Have a Watch
Hawaii
Hints on Building Snow Forts
Hobo Joe Junkpan
Hobo Names 1-100
Hobo Names 101-200
Hobo Names 201-300
Hobo Names 301-400
Hobo Names 401-500
Hobo Names 501-600
Hobo Names 601-700
Hohoq (also known as Ar)
How and Where to Contact me, and Some Clarification of My Curious New Lifestyle, Part 1
How and Where to Contact me, and Some Clarification of My Curious New Lifestyle, Part 2
How to Be Famous: Where You May Have Seen Me On Television
How to Be a Famous Minor Television Personality, Part 1
How to Be a Famous Minor Television Personality, Part 2
How to Be a Famous Minor Television Personality, Part 3: Table 27: Brushes with Fame
How to Be a Famous Minor Television Personality, Part 4
How to Be a Famous Minor Television Personality, Part 5 / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "Intoxication Tips of the Stars"
How to Buy a Computer from a Street Vendor, Part 1
How to Buy a Computer from a Street Vendor, Part 2
How to Deal with Some Common Infestations, Part 2
How to Deal with Some Common Infestations, Part 3 / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "The Literary Axolotl" / How to Cook Owls
How to Protect Yourself from Identity Theft
How to Raise Rabbits for Food and Fur: the Utopian Method
How to Remember Any Name, Especially the Name "John Hodgman"
How to Tell the Future Using a Pig's Spleen
How to Vote
How to Win a Fight
Idaho
Idiosyncracies of the Great Detectives
Illinois
Indiana
Information You Will Find Useful in the Present: How to Write a Book / the Fifty-Five Dramatic Situations
Iowa
Jesse Lee Bowen and the New Jersey Devil
Joey Stink-Eye Smiles
John Hodgman
Jokes That Have Never Produced Laughter (feat. Paul Rudd)
Jonathon Colton / Friends of the Furry Old Lobster
Kansas
Karl Malden
Kentucky
Little-Known Laws of Two American Communities
Louisiana
Maine
Many Names for the Same Sandwich / Oysters: How and When and Why / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "The Upside-Down World" / PS: On Oysters
Maryland
Massachusetts
Michigan
Mindbender Steve
Minnesota
Mississippi
Missouri
Montana
More Answers, Part 2
More Answers, Part 3 / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "Banned for 22 Points"
More Answers, Part 4
More Matters Literary: the Six Essentials
More Surprising Eponyms
More Wisdom of the High Old Farmer / Some Folk Remedies
More on Tapeworms, and Other Famous Animal Acts
Nebraska
Nevada
New Hampshire
New Jersey
New Mexico
New York
No Tenenbaum, No Tenenbaum
North Carolina
North Dakota
Ohio
Oklahoma
Old Playground Rhymes with Hidden Meanings
On Actuaries and Their Tattoos
On the Matter of Nutrient Slime / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "Our American Full-Sultan"
On the Subject of Tells
One of My Great Regrets
Oregon
Our 51 United States: the States, Their Nicknames and Mottoes, and Other Facts Critical to Safe Travel
Panasonic Farm
Pegleg Island
Pennsylvania
Possible Contacts with Alien Life, Part 1
Possible Contacts with Alien Life, Part 2
Possible Contacts with Alien Life, Part 3
Possible Contacts with Alien Life, Part 4
Possible Contacts with Alien Life, Part 5
Prohibition Era Euphemisms for Alcohol
Ragnarok
Rhode Island
Secret World Government Recognition Test
Secrets of Yale University
Secrets of the Mall of America
Seven Hundred Hobo Names
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 1 through 40
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 121 through 160
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 161 through 200
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 201 through 240
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 241 through 280
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 281 through 320
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 321 through 360
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 361 through 400
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 401 through 420
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 41 through 80
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 421 through 453
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 453 through 479
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 480 through 500
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 501 through 520
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 521 through 540
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 541 through 560
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 561 through 580
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 581 through 600
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 601 through 620
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 621 through 640
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 641 through 660
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 661 through 680
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 681 through 700
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: 81 through 120
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: Introduction, part 1
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: Introduction, part 2
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: Introduction, part 3
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: Introduction, part 4
Seven Hundred Mole-Man Names: Introduction, part 5
Several S-ually Suggestive Christmas Songs / the Best Mas Ever, Part 1
Shitty Aphorisms
Six Foods of the New World, Part 2
Six Oaths of the Virtuous Child
Slingshot
Some American Telephone Numbers Beginning with '666'
Some Hangover Cures Involving Gin
Some Internet Rumors That Will Not Die! / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "Mister Beep Boop"
Some Less Scientific Methods of Telling the Future That Actually Work
Some Lists I Confess to Compiling
Some More Monsters, Part 2
Some Prophets Who Were Not Actuaries
Some Questions That Were Actually Asked on the Internet, If Not Exactly "Frequently," Then at Least Once, Part 1
Some Questions That Were Actually Asked on the Internet, If Not Exactly "Frequently," Then at Least Once, Part 2 / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "Secret Ponytails"
South Carolina
South Dakota
Speaking of Parasites, How Do I Protect My Child from the Scourge of Head Lice? / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "Are All Parasites Evil?"
Sure Thing Number One: Roulette
Sure Thing Number Three: Star Wars Slots / Sure Thing Number Four: Hermit-Crab Racing / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "Annals of the American Musical Theater"
Sure Thing Number Two: Poker
Table 10 and Table 11: Dog People v. Cat People
Table 12: For Expert Barbers Only
Table 16: Washington, D.C., as Seen From Great Heights
Table 17: Worship v. Weight Table for the Raising of Utopian Rabbits
Table 1: Omens v. Portents
Table 20: A Troubleshooting Guide to the New Voting Machines
Table 22: Your Twelve-Month Spleencast
Table 25: the Many Hands of Poker
Table 2: Special Long-Term Predictions for Sailors
Table 3: the Fifty-Five Dramatic Situations
Table 5: Other Markets for Your Short Stories
Table 6: Tipping Guide to the Great Hotels: To Ensure Prompt Service
Table 7: Classic Ice and Snowballs
Table 8: Discredited Styles
Table 9: Great Rivalries in Dungeons & Dragons
Table of Contents
Tennessee
Texas
The Areas of My Expertise Part 1 of 3
The Areas of My Expertise Part 2 of 3
The Areas of My Expertise Part 3 of 3
The Best Mas Ever, Part 2
The Best Mas Ever, Part 3
The Blurbs with Ricky Gervais, part 1
The Blurbs with Ricky Gervais, part 2
The Blurbs with Ricky Gervais, part 3
The Carlsbad Guanists
The Electoral College
The Future and Other Superstitions: How to Tell the Future: More Omens and Portents for the Coming Year
The Hidden World (Not Including Mole-Men): Some More Monsters, Part 1
The Internet: A Series of Tubes
The Kingdom of Central Park
The Lenny and Squiggy
The Loch Ness Monster and Col. Robert Wilson
The Mole-Men: Are They the New Hoboes?: the Seven Portals to the Hollow Earth, Part 1
The One Downside of Fame
The Pajama Man
The Perks of Fame, Part 1
The Perks of Fame, Part 2
The Pig in a Poke
The Presidents of the United States: Are They the New Hoboes? Some Notes on the Upcoming Presidential Election
The Randomizer 1
The Randomizer 2
The Randomizer 3
The Randomizer 4
The Randomizer 5
The Saw Creekers
The Secret Moon Landing
The Seven Portals to the Hollow Earth, Part 2
The Seven Portals to the Hollow Earth, Part 3
The Seven Portals to the Hollow Earth, Part 4
The Seven Portals to the Hollow Earth, Part 5
The Seven Portals to the Hollow Earth, Part 6
The Seven Portals to the Hollow Earth, Part 7 / the Hodgman Literary Tone Detector: AND WHY YOU SHOULD BUY IT
The Theme Song
The Vengeful Ninjas
There Is More Past Than You Thought / Nine Presidents with Hooks for Hands
They Never Said It
Things to Know About Babies / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "A Sweep Is as Lucky as Lucky Can Be"
Three-Card Monte
Titles
Today in the Past: April 10
Today in the Past: April 11
Today in the Past: April 12
Today in the Past: April 13
Today in the Past: April 14
Today in the Past: April 15
Today in the Past: April 16
Today in the Past: April 17
Today in the Past: April 18
Today in the Past: April 19
Today in the Past: April 1
Today in the Past: April 20
Today in the Past: April 21
Today in the Past: April 22
Today in the Past: April 23
Today in the Past: April 24
Today in the Past: April 25
Today in the Past: April 26
Today in the Past: April 27
Today in the Past: April 28
Today in the Past: April 29
Today in the Past: April 2
Today in the Past: April 30
Today in the Past: April 3
Today in the Past: April 4
Today in the Past: April 5
Today in the Past: April 6
Today in the Past: April 7
Today in the Past: April 8
Today in the Past: April 9
Today in the Past: August 10
Today in the Past: August 11
Today in the Past: August 12
Today in the Past: August 13
Today in the Past: August 14
Today in the Past: August 15
Today in the Past: August 16
Today in the Past: August 17
Today in the Past: August 18
Today in the Past: August 19
Today in the Past: August 1
Today in the Past: August 20
Today in the Past: August 21
Today in the Past: August 22
Today in the Past: August 23
Today in the Past: August 24
Today in the Past: August 25
Today in the Past: August 26
Today in the Past: August 27
Today in the Past: August 28
Today in the Past: August 29
Today in the Past: August 2
Today in the Past: August 30
Today in the Past: August 31
Today in the Past: August 3
Today in the Past: August 4
Today in the Past: August 5
Today in the Past: August 6
Today in the Past: August 7
Today in the Past: August 8
Today in the Past: August 9
Today in the Past: December 10
Today in the Past: December 11
Today in the Past: December 12
Today in the Past: December 13
Today in the Past: December 14
Today in the Past: December 15
Today in the Past: December 16
Today in the Past: December 17
Today in the Past: December 18
Today in the Past: December 19
Today in the Past: December 1
Today in the Past: December 20
Today in the Past: December 21
Today in the Past: December 22
Today in the Past: December 23
Today in the Past: December 24
Today in the Past: December 25
Today in the Past: December 26
Today in the Past: December 27
Today in the Past: December 28
Today in the Past: December 29
Today in the Past: December 2
Today in the Past: December 30
Today in the Past: December 31
Today in the Past: December 3
Today in the Past: December 4
Today in the Past: December 5
Today in the Past: December 6
Today in the Past: December 7
Today in the Past: December 8
Today in the Past: December 9
Today in the Past: February 10
Today in the Past: February 11
Today in the Past: February 12
Today in the Past: February 13
Today in the Past: February 14
Today in the Past: February 15
Today in the Past: February 16
Today in the Past: February 17
Today in the Past: February 18
Today in the Past: February 19
Today in the Past: February 1
Today in the Past: February 20
Today in the Past: February 21
Today in the Past: February 22
Today in the Past: February 23
Today in the Past: February 24
Today in the Past: February 25
Today in the Past: February 26
Today in the Past: February 27
Today in the Past: February 28
Today in the Past: February 29
Today in the Past: February 2
Today in the Past: February 3
Today in the Past: February 4
Today in the Past: February 5
Today in the Past: February 6
Today in the Past: February 7
Today in the Past: February 8
Today in the Past: February 9
Today in the Past: Introduction
Today in the Past: January 10
Today in the Past: January 11
Today in the Past: January 12
Today in the Past: January 13
Today in the Past: January 14
Today in the Past: January 15
Today in the Past: January 16
Today in the Past: January 17
Today in the Past: January 18
Today in the Past: January 19
Today in the Past: January 1
Today in the Past: January 20
Today in the Past: January 21
Today in the Past: January 22
Today in the Past: January 23
Today in the Past: January 24
Today in the Past: January 25
Today in the Past: January 26
Today in the Past: January 27
Today in the Past: January 28
Today in the Past: January 29
Today in the Past: January 2
Today in the Past: January 30
Today in the Past: January 31
Today in the Past: January 3
Today in the Past: January 4
Today in the Past: January 5
Today in the Past: January 6
Today in the Past: January 7
Today in the Past: January 8
Today in the Past: January 9
Today in the Past: July 10
Today in the Past: July 11
Today in the Past: July 12
Today in the Past: July 13
Today in the Past: July 14
Today in the Past: July 15
Today in the Past: July 16
Today in the Past: July 17
Today in the Past: July 18
Today in the Past: July 19
Today in the Past: July 1
Today in the Past: July 20
Today in the Past: July 21
Today in the Past: July 22
Today in the Past: July 23
Today in the Past: July 24
Today in the Past: July 25
Today in the Past: July 26
Today in the Past: July 27
Today in the Past: July 28
Today in the Past: July 29
Today in the Past: July 2
Today in the Past: July 30
Today in the Past: July 31
Today in the Past: July 3
Today in the Past: July 4
Today in the Past: July 5
Today in the Past: July 6
Today in the Past: July 7
Today in the Past: July 8
Today in the Past: July 9
Today in the Past: June 10
Today in the Past: June 11
Today in the Past: June 12
Today in the Past: June 13
Today in the Past: June 14
Today in the Past: June 15
Today in the Past: June 16
Today in the Past: June 17
Today in the Past: June 18
Today in the Past: June 19
Today in the Past: June 1
Today in the Past: June 20
Today in the Past: June 21
Today in the Past: June 22
Today in the Past: June 23
Today in the Past: June 24
Today in the Past: June 25
Today in the Past: June 26
Today in the Past: June 27
Today in the Past: June 28
Today in the Past: June 29
Today in the Past: June 2
Today in the Past: June 30
Today in the Past: June 3
Today in the Past: June 4
Today in the Past: June 5
Today in the Past: June 6
Today in the Past: June 7
Today in the Past: June 8
Today in the Past: June 9
Today in the Past: March 10
Today in the Past: March 11
Today in the Past: March 12
Today in the Past: March 13
Today in the Past: March 14
Today in the Past: March 15
Today in the Past: March 16
Today in the Past: March 17
Today in the Past: March 18
Today in the Past: March 19
Today in the Past: March 1
Today in the Past: March 20
Today in the Past: March 21
Today in the Past: March 22
Today in the Past: March 23
Today in the Past: March 24
Today in the Past: March 25
Today in the Past: March 26
Today in the Past: March 27
Today in the Past: March 28
Today in the Past: March 29
Today in the Past: March 2
Today in the Past: March 30
Today in the Past: March 31
Today in the Past: March 3
Today in the Past: March 4
Today in the Past: March 5
Today in the Past: March 6
Today in the Past: March 7
Today in the Past: March 8
Today in the Past: March 9
Today in the Past: May 10
Today in the Past: May 11
Today in the Past: May 12
Today in the Past: May 13
Today in the Past: May 14
Today in the Past: May 15
Today in the Past: May 16
Today in the Past: May 17
Today in the Past: May 18
Today in the Past: May 19
Today in the Past: May 1
Today in the Past: May 20
Today in the Past: May 21
Today in the Past: May 22
Today in the Past: May 23
Today in the Past: May 24
Today in the Past: May 25
Today in the Past: May 26
Today in the Past: May 27
Today in the Past: May 28
Today in the Past: May 29
Today in the Past: May 2
Today in the Past: May 30
Today in the Past: May 31
Today in the Past: May 3
Today in the Past: May 4
Today in the Past: May 5
Today in the Past: May 6
Today in the Past: May 7
Today in the Past: May 8
Today in the Past: May 9
Today in the Past: November 10
Today in the Past: November 11
Today in the Past: November 12
Today in the Past: November 13
Today in the Past: November 14
Today in the Past: November 15
Today in the Past: November 16
Today in the Past: November 17
Today in the Past: November 18
Today in the Past: November 19
Today in the Past: November 1
Today in the Past: November 20
Today in the Past: November 21
Today in the Past: November 22
Today in the Past: November 23
Today in the Past: November 24
Today in the Past: November 25
Today in the Past: November 26
Today in the Past: November 27
Today in the Past: November 28
Today in the Past: November 29
Today in the Past: November 2
Today in the Past: November 30
Today in the Past: November 3
Today in the Past: November 4
Today in the Past: November 5
Today in the Past: November 6
Today in the Past: November 7
Today in the Past: November 8
Today in the Past: November 9
Today in the Past: October 10
Today in the Past: October 11
Today in the Past: October 12
Today in the Past: October 13
Today in the Past: October 14
Today in the Past: October 15
Today in the Past: October 16
Today in the Past: October 17
Today in the Past: October 18
Today in the Past: October 19
Today in the Past: October 1
Today in the Past: October 20
Today in the Past: October 21
Today in the Past: October 22
Today in the Past: October 23
Today in the Past: October 24
Today in the Past: October 25
Today in the Past: October 26
Today in the Past: October 27
Today in the Past: October 28
Today in the Past: October 29
Today in the Past: October 2
Today in the Past: October 30
Today in the Past: October 31
Today in the Past: October 3
Today in the Past: October 4
Today in the Past: October 5
Today in the Past: October 6
Today in the Past: October 7
Today in the Past: October 8
Today in the Past: October 9
Today in the Past: September 10
Today in the Past: September 11
Today in the Past: September 12
Today in the Past: September 13
Today in the Past: September 14
Today in the Past: September 15
Today in the Past: September 16
Today in the Past: September 17
Today in the Past: September 18
Today in the Past: September 19
Today in the Past: September 1
Today in the Past: September 20
Today in the Past: September 21
Today in the Past: September 22
Today in the Past: September 23
Today in the Past: September 24
Today in the Past: September 25
Today in the Past: September 26
Today in the Past: September 27
Today in the Past: September 28
Today in the Past: September 29
Today in the Past: September 2
Today in the Past: September 30
Today in the Past: September 3
Today in the Past: September 4
Today in the Past: September 5
Today in the Past: September 6
Today in the Past: September 7
Today in the Past: September 8
Today in the Past: September 9
Tonight You Belong to Me
Top Spots for Crabs
Two Libraries That Are Smaller Than This Book
Utah
Utopias
Vermont
Virginia
WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "Vera Aux Falsa?"
Wacky Neighbors
Washington, D.C.: the City of Magnificent Distances
Washington
Were You Aware of It?
West Virginia
What I Plan to Do with My Enormous Wealth
What Will Happen in the Future / Omens and Portents for the Coming Year
What You Did Not Know About Hoboes
What You Did Not Know About the Past / History's Worst Men's Haircuts
What the Casinos Don't Want You to Know
What to Expect While Serving as a Juror, Part 1
What to Expect While Serving as a Juror, Part 2
When Writing, Please Avoid These Failed Palindromes
Where to Sell Your Short Stories / Table 4: Where to Market Your Stories That Sound Exactly Like Raunchy Photo Captions
Who Is Going to Win the Presidential Election / WERE YOU AWARE OF IT? "William Jennings Bryan's Cross of Monkey Corpses"
Wisconsin
Wyoming